My Review: 8
Do you have a close friend of the same sex? Someone with whom you spend a LOT of time? I do.
We drive places together, drink coffee together, eat together, play Guitar Hero together. It’s very sweet. Sometimes we argue, we laugh a lot, and we make fun of other people together. It’s like we’re dating, or even married. But we’re both straight. Sometimes I think I’d be good at being gay, but I am pretty much into women and boobs.
He’s married, I’m getting married in two weeks, and we both like girls, so we don’t have sex with one another. Which I think probably makes the relationship less complicated than it might otherwise be. We piss each other off, buy presents for each other, and help each other feel better about ourselves. We’re in a gay relationship without the sex, and it’s awesome.

You know how I know you’re gay (and your friend there…I know who you are). My question is, which is Burt and which is Ernie?
Well said.